On Reading “The Divine Comedy”
Oh sweet Book, thou mantlest thyself with a smile, by what ardentcy dost thou require my time whose arrow, aimed right or left, loosed evermore sheathgone, anon to crawl, broken mirror upon, ever opening virgin wounds ere disconsidered more believable than metamorphastication of hell’s lord to heaven’s Supreme Good, be collected!
Captain’s Log 
Lord, help me! What in heaven’s name is being collected at the end of this sentence? The time spent reading the book? The arrows? The shards of broken mirror? Or, perhaps, could it be the pieces of brain that exploded in the attempt to wrap around the meaning of this single sentence? 😆 Whew! This was fun to read! Off to find my own dusty copy…I will make sure to read it only while wearing a helmet and full body armor.
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Ha. I elaborated a bit, but started with exact words/parts of speech from the text. I have taken to penciling in some summary or point of each paragraph as I read because, like I tried to repeat here, I get to the end of a para and think, “So he has another question? That’s all this means?!”
(And yes, the short version of my imitation is, “Oh sweet Book, with what ardentcy [funny-to-me new word] do you collect my time.”)
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